1 | Larry Brash | 61 | Driving under the influence of alcohol = On tour in a vehicle, drenched full of gin. |
2 | Adrian Hickford | 41 | Ancient armour on ~ a Roman Centurion. |
3 | David Bourke | 33 | Colombian creep = Cocaine problem. |
4 | Deano | 24 | I'm as honest as the day is long = Has to say he's not misleading. |
5 | Rick | 20 | Environmental disaster = Never mind as it's not real. |
6 | Tony Crafter | 19 | Being honest = Benign ethos. |
6 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 19 | Adult Education Classes = I see usual clots can't add. |
8 | View | 17 | Confessional = On scale of sin. |
9 | aussie battler | 14 | Madhouses ~ do us shame. |
10 | Zoran Radisavlevic | 11 | Lotion = Not oil. |
10 | James H Young | 11 | USB = Bus. |
12 | Scott Gardner | 9 | IED = Die! |
13 | Mey Kraus | 7 | Rehab centers = The beer narcs. |
14 | Ellie | 6 | Environmental disasters, ~ and mess is NOT irrelevant. |
15 | Toby Gottfried | 4 | Lack of originality = Cry, "Look, I lift again!" |
Total points: | 296 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.294) |
1 | Mey Kraus | 92 | Mike Newell's 'Harry Potter and the Gob... = Enthralling film, yet we prefer to rea... |
2 | Larry Brash | 35 | "Genius is born - not paid" (Oscar Wilde) = A sociable wit drudges on in prison. |
3 | Tony Crafter | 31 | Madonna reverts to her raunchy image = More men can adore this naughty raver. |
4 | David A Green | 30 | 'The Rise of the Indian Rope Trick' by ... = Fakir climbed an eternity into the tro... |
5 | Scott Gardner | 25 | iTune player'll protect ~ intellectual property? |
6 | Toby Gottfried | 23 | Paul McCartney's 'Let It Be' = Beatle lyric can tempt us. |
7 | Paul Pan | 21 | The Beatles' 'Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da' = I hate bad, obsolete ballad! |
8 | David Bourke | 15 | Male touch attracts ~ the actor Matt Lucas. |
9 | Ellie | 8 | Keats: 'Ode to a Nightingale' = I take note: a song, a delight! |
9 | View | 8 | Actress Maria Schneider = Dame is a rich screen star. |
11 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 7 | Ten Green Bottles Standing on the Wall = ban idle, gentle songs that won't relent. |
Total points: | 295 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.216) |
1 | View | 71 | Riots in French capital = Conflict in Paris heart. |
2 | Larry Brash | 40 | Vatican: "No gay priests!" = Get a pansy vicar? It's "No!" |
3 | Mey Kraus | 39 | The Macy's Parade Disaster: Balloon Fal... = "Well", passers-by admit, "the scandal... |
3 | Linda Garner | 39 | George Bush's bird flu pandemic plan= Grip on a Bible, pledge funds, charm us. |
5 | Toby Gottfried | 33 | The United States Marine Corps = President can use them at riots ? |
6 | David Bourke | 21 | Tony Blair's days are numbered = Labour reds bin "yesterday man". |
7 | Tony Crafter | 20 | Most Americans say Bush is not honest = Many a home can't trust his obsessions. |
8 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 12 | Pirates rob us in ~ Seabourn Spirit. |
9 | Rick | 8 | The Seabourn Spirit = Pirates botherin' us. |
Total points: | 283 | from 49 votes (DFE factor: 0.184) |
1 | Mey Kraus | 55 | The US comedian Seinfeld = He's often induced a smile. |
2 | Linda Garner | 52 | Mark Twain, Samuel Langhorne Clemens = All Americans knew gentleman's humor. (Awardsmaster's Choice Award) |
3 | Ellie | 50 | Eisenhower = See hero win. |
4 | Scott Gardner | 31 | Angela Dorothea Merkel = Look -- a German, the leader! |
5 | Larry Brash | 28 | The late George Best = Gee, got the last beer. |
6 | Tony Crafter | 27 | Iosif Vissarionovich Stalin = Rash visions of civilisation. |
7 | David Bourke | 26 | The actress Maria Schneider = A dream star...her chest is nice! |
8 | Toby Gottfried | 18 | The composer Leonard Bernstein's ~ been so prominent, led orchestras. |
9 | View | 9 | French composer Claude Achille Debussy = A bunch of classic cheery model preludes. |
Total points: | 296 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.176) |
1 | Toby Gottfried | 74 | The National Geographic Society = A great lion photo is eye-catching. |
2 | Deano | 49 | The Bangladeshi = He bad at English. |
3 | Paul Pan | 28 | United States of America = I, Tom Cruise, defeat Satan. |
4 | Tony Crafter | 27 | The Voluntary Euthanasia Society = A hasty route to Heaven? It is lunacy! |
5 | Mey Kraus | 25 | The Marcel Marceau Foundation = Natural for each mute comedian. |
6 | aussie battler | 24 | Cavalier = A vile car? |
7 | Horrid Stretchy Pus | 22 | British Antarctic Survey = vast terrain's icy but rich. |
8 | David A Green | 18 | The National Association of Paper Merchants = Oh no! This meant an acacia rainforest topples! |
9 | Don Rogers | 16 | Colgate University = Strict Ivy League ? No. |
10 | Scott Gardner | 10 | Concord, New Hampshire = Damp here; chronic snow. |
11 | David Bourke | 6 | Peninsular and Oriental Steam Navigation... = Dover to Calais: I'm an annoying, unple... |
Total points: | 299 | from 51 votes (DFE factor: 0.216) |
1 | Tony Crafter | 56 | New movie: 'The Chronicles of Narnia: T... = Worthwhile to see it on a whim, for it... |
2 | David A Green | 50 | 'Seven Pillars of Wisdom: A Triumph' by... = Will whip my humped camels onwards ove... |
3 | Mey Kraus | 40 | "On the Origin of Species by Means of N... = No race'll be superior if not strong, ... |
4 | David Bourke | 39 | The late former Manchester United and N... = Errant Ulsterman, real romancer, or the... |
5 | Ellie | 35 | "There were three of us in this marriage... = We sense defeat: see her in a trap, a t... |
6 | Toby Gottfried | 27 | Quagmire: a soft wet area of low-lying ... = Iraqmire: Fool/flunky wages this fatal... |
7 | Larry Brash | 20 | Military Compensation and Rehabilitation... = So poor veteran cheats in an interim d... |
Total points: | 267 | from 46 votes (DFE factor: 0.152) |
1 | Ellie | 96 | Element: MAN Symbol: XY Atomic Wei... = Element: WOMAN Symbol: Wo Atomic ... |
2 | Larry Brash | 75 | John is getting married to the girl of h... = John and his bride go on their honeym... |
3 | Tony Crafter | 30 | FAMOUS DIAMONDS The Centenary Diamond Th... = My dream, A dream I couldn't afford, H... |
4 | Mey Kraus | 24 | ... = BTW, note the reply of that server ho... |
Total points: | 225 | from 40 votes (DFE factor: 0.100) |
1 | James H Young | 54 | Comparisions |
2 | Tony Crafter | 48 | JERUSALEM. |
3 | Adrian Hickford | 33 | An Austrian Army Alaric A. Watts. |
4 | Mey Kraus | 25 | The Aristocrats |
5 | View | 8 | Ringed with the azure world, he stands. |
Total points: | 168 | from 30 votes (DFE factor: 0.167) |
1 | Paul Pan | 65 | A fag + a fairy = A gay affair. |
2 | Tony Crafter | 52 | She's a great lay = Easy shag alert. |
3 | Rick | 31 | The United States Marine Corps = A prostitute's dream? Ten inches! |
4 | Mey Kraus | 28 | Sperm donations = It's poor men's DNA. |
5 | Adrian Hickford | 25 | He always comes first = Screws mate oafishly. |
6 | David Bourke | 14 | The adult movie fluffers = Stiff mouthful revealed. |
7 | aussie battler | 13 | It's pure heck ~ up shit creek. |
8 | View | 12 | Chemical toilets ~ melt coeliac shit. |
Total points: | 240 | from 42 votes (DFE factor: 0.190) |
Daniel F. Etter Memorial Award Points*
*Adjusted Points = Sum of (Points * 'DFE factor') |
High Standings
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The results above are provisional and may be inaccurate.
The official results will be published on the Results Page after double-checking the scores.