AUGUST 1998 NOMINATIONS

Anagrammy Awards > Nomination Archives > 1998


THE GENERAL CATEGORY

1st - Larry Brash with:
Religion is the opium of the masses =
Sometimes, if theologian is pusher.

2nd - Kevin Hale with:
Mobile Telephone =
Bleep me in the loo.

3rd - Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Honeymoon =
O-O! No hymen!!

Larry Brash with:
Surgeon =
Go, nurse!

Larry Brash with:
Plastic surgeon =
Organise, sculpt.

Larry Brash with:
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder =
Terrors rose amidst stupid acts.

Larry Brash with:
Major Depression =
Err... join sad mopes.

Larry Brash with:
Cosmetic Surgeon =
Nice customers go.

Larry Brash with:
Residents =
Tiredness.

Richard Brodie with:
The human genetic code =
A hi-tech gene document.

Darren Donlen with:
Orthodontic Surgeon =
Using no other doctor.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Breast feeding =
Breeding feast.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
He who is without sin may cast the first stone =
If hurts: anesthesia with white mossy cotton.

Earle Jones with:
Orthopedic Surgeon =
Soothing procedure.

Earle Jones with:
The American Dream =
Maniac harmed tree.

Meyran Kraus with:
alt.singles =
Let's sin, gal!

Meyran Kraus with:
A broken heart? =
Break another!

Meyran Kraus with:
William Tunstall-Pedoe's generator =
Lend tool? Pure, wise little anagrams!


THE ENTERTAINMENT CATEGORY

1st - Larry Brash with:
The Complete Works of William Shakespeare =
Hamlet, Othello, Caesar irk. We skip few poems.

eq.2nd - Wayne Baisley with:
Margaret Mitchell's "Gone with the Wind" =
Ditch the gown. Greet William T. Sherman.

eq.2nd - Steve Krakowski with:
"A Clockwork Orange" by Anthony Burgess =
Lab breaks cocky youth's rage, non? Wrong!

eq.2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
The mask of Zorro =
To hero's mark of 'Z'.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Matthew Broderick in "Godzilla" =
A lizard blocked mightier town.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
The Russians Are Coming! The Russians Are Coming! =
Such rashness! Intrusion into America's mere gag!

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Margaret Mitchell's "Gone with the Wind" =
Oscar winner gem held them at twilight.

Larry Brash with:
Margaret Mitchell's "Gone with the Wind" =
Ernesto will win! He'd match great might.

Mick Tully with:
Antony and Cleopatra =
Act a one-and-only part.


THE TOPICAL CATEGORY

1st - William Tunstall-Pedoe with:
White House Intern Miss Monica Samille Lewinsky =
Hey! William Clinton arouses me. Hi! I'm Ken's witness!

eq.2nd - Tom Myers with:
Steve Fossett's Balloon =
Boost sent vessel aloft.

eq.2nd - Richard Peers with:
I did have a relationship with Miss Lewinsky =
I think sperm love is lewdish sin; I had it away!

Larry Brash with:
Monica Samille Lewinsky =
William claims Ken nosey.

Larry Brash with:
Monica Lewinsky's dress =
I wank, dry-come; less sins.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
UK Cardiologist guilty of misconduct =
Mick Tully to caucus: idiot Dr's goofing.

Ward Hardman with:
William Jefferson Blythe Clinton's "legacy" =
Joy scene: hell-bent Willy, staff girl Monica.

Earle Jones with:
National Rifle Association =
Ratifies an antisocial loon.

Meyran Kraus with:
Monica Lewinsky's Dress =
Dry semen? So lick was sin!

Keith Lehman with:
Michael Jackson Turns Forty =
Funky Character Lost No Jism.

Keith Lehman with:
Clinton Used The Military =
Hid Testimony until clear.

Tom Myers with:
Ending of the Tour de France =
Note drug offender in cheat.

Richard Peers with:
Monica Lewinsky's dress =
Nickers on - my ass is lewd!


THE RUDE CATEGORY

1st - Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Bernardo Bertolucci's "Last Tango in Paris" =
O! Born to place rancid butter in a girl's ass.

2nd - Larry Brash with:
Coitus interruptus =
Cunt user rips it out!

3rd - Tom Myers with:
Secret is Washington's best kept =
Test backs wet penis shot. Resign!

Larry Brash with:
Priapism is a sustained erection =
Penis remained up. O, it's at a crisis!

Larry Brash with:
Masturbation =
Anatomist rub.

Larry Brash with:
Masturbation =
No trauma bits.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Bernardo Bertolucci's "Last Tango in Paris" =
Brando erotic act is troubling anal press.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Amateur Eurasienne 19 years old (shaved) - quick camera =
Evil scammer!! You're an air-head cunt - a squeaked arse.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Molecular Genetics =
Cunt mileage closer.

Meyran Kraus with:
X and Y Chromosomes =
My charm on? So do sex.

Tom Myers with:
Inappropriate relationship =
Ah, I splat protein on ripe pair.

Richard Peers with:
Sneakpeek explanation and summary for alt.anagrams =
Peers, an onanist: frank sexual poke at a mammary gland.

Mick Tully with:
Brand new book - INNUENDOES =
Knob deed now? Boner in anus!


THE SPAM CATEGORY

1st - Johnnie Burning Elk with:
Newsgroups Florida =
A group of swindlers.

2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Please add me to your mailing list =
You tell lies, I end it - do spamagram.

eq.3rd - Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Double your gas mileage and pay 1/2 price for gasoline! =
You are a silly bugger!! (predefined apologia on scam).

eq.3rd - Richard Peers with:
Want fast cash without losing anything in your pocket? =
What's this shit? Go away, fucking prat! O-O, clout net ninny!

eq.3rd - Mick Tully with:
Passes - backdoors & Mo' =
SOS! Spam-based crook.

Richard Brodie with:
It doesn't get any easier than this! =
(Edit that set?) "Erase annoying shit!"

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Double your gas mileage and pay 1/2 price for gasoline! =
Silly bugger, paranoia founded eerie scam apology.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Double your gas mileage and pay 1/2 price for gasoline! =
E. Guiraldes pioneered braying a foul scam apology.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Please read this UNIQUE program... THEN READ IT AGAIN! =
Adapt, equine pariah!! (Ernesto Guiraldes' nightmare.)

Meyran Kraus with:
Please add me to your mailing list =
See my 'polite' anagrams, dull idiot.

Meyran Kraus with:
Can This Be Real =
Cash? Be net liar!

Meyran Kraus with:
Can This Be Real =
Cash be in later.


THE LONG CATEGORY

1st - Mattias Inghe with:
One day, when I couldn't decide what the hell I should make an anagram out of, I got this funky idea. "Aha! Why not make a great anagram out of the fact that I can not find any suitable text?" So I just typed this down, and made the little masterpiece below with it. Oh, am I a fantastic wonderful genius or what?
=
This is what became the anagrammed solution to the four sentences of non-important shit I typed. I had an idea of what I want, but no idea whether I would fix a decent lucky hack. Hate to say, I think it went well, at last, to get an affiliated, thoughtful, homemade, and juicy anagram today. Use Long Award?

2nd - Richard Brodie with:
It isn't illegal for two consenting adults to have an intimate relationship. So by what logic can it be considered an obstruction of justice to give advice to someone not to cooperate with a grand jury presuming to investigate a non-crime?
=
Noting anachronistic puritanical farce now to be enacted on National stage: very self-righteous hypocritical tone is just total vengeance motion. Judging Clinton's private two-timing amorous misbehavior is to be detested. We do it too!

3rd - Larry Brash with:
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders =
Information circulated to assign mad, sad and ill states.

Larry Brash with:
While the quote sounds like she is telling her naughty dog to get outside, Lady MacBeth, racked with grief, becomes psychotic, hallucinating a bloody spot on her hand that cannot ever be washed away.
=
"Out, d..damned Spot, out I say. You shat on my carpet once too often! Quiet, you g..gross, groveling, c..canine beast! H..h..hey, what will c..clean the shit stain, eh? I'll kill the b..bastard, eh?" He barked, wagged, chewed, hid.

Larry Brash with:
Sneakpeek explanation and summary for alt.anagrams =
Mey Kraus, a spam mangler and near-fast explanation, OK?

Richard Brodie with:
He that is without sin among you let him first cast a stone at her. =
Hey wait! This is rot! Stones hurt. I fling humane tomato at cheats.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Want fast cash without losing anything in your pocket? If so, please reply me back (e-mail). =
Gambit? Ernesto unhappy. Who are you foolin', flaky gawk? This scam is pestilent!! Cancel it!!!

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
My mama done tol' me, when I was in knee-pants
My mama done tol' me, "Son, a woman'll sweet talk"
=
Wow! Wanton Tennessee mamma
has me lamentin' now;
totally dammed -
a simple yokel. OK, man?

Meyran Kraus with:
Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex But Were Afraid To Ask =
Laugh at Woody's neurosis and anxiety. Few vary, two better. Weak tabu. OK!

Meyran Kraus with:
Sneakpeek explanation and summary for alt.anagrams =
M. Tully as a dear man, an expert of enigmas. Ask: "A prank?" No!


THE PEOPLE'S NAMES CATEGORY

1st - William Tunstall-Pedoe with:
The Artist formerly known as 'Prince' =
No first-rate workmanship recently!

2nd - Larry Brash with:
William Tunstall-Pedoe wrote Anagram Genius =
A program will use names to untangle ideal wit.

eq.3rd - Ward Hardman with:
William Jefferson Blythe Clinton =
Intern job: Monica felt Willy flesh.

eq.3rd - Tom Myers with:
Slobodan Milosevic =
I'm a cold evil boss, no?

Larry Brash with:
Garrick Ransome =
Arrogance? Smirk!

Larry Brash with:
Joshua Jeremy Tan Ming Liang =
Ahem! Just a lingering joy, man.

Larry Brash with:
Krejeko Jasti =
It's a joke, jerk.

Larry Brash with:
Maurits Cornelius Escher =
Enter slim curious arches.

Larry Brash with:
Maurits Cornelius Escher =
Music rules his art. Encore!

Larry Brash with:
Maurits Cornelius Escher =
Emulates rich recursions.

Richard Brodie with:
Sir W.W. "The Khan" Hubert =
Hi, Brash! We knew truth!

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Warren Beatty =
Beware, tyrant.

Mick Tully with:
Madeleine Allbright =
All-time large behind!

Mick Tully with:
Osama bin Laden =
A damn alien S.O.B!

Mick Tully with:
Chairman Mao =
I am on a march.

Mick Tully with:
Sir Les Patterson, Minister of the Arts =
Sorriest simpleton farts in theatres.

Mick Tully with:
Michael Flatley =
He fell? Calamity!

William Tunstall-Pedoe with:
Madeleine Albright =
Hell! meatier and big.


THE OTHER NAMES CATEGORY

1st - Larry Brash with:
Worldwide Church of God =
Which drug fooled crowd?

2nd - Mick Tully with:
The FA Carling Premiership =
Shearer? Flipping rich, mate!

eq.3rd - Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Tottenham Hotspur Football Club =
Rotten shampoo clot. Bathtub full!

eq.3rd - Richard Peers with:
Tottenham Hotspur Football Club =
Tall team bolts to pub; honour THFC.

Mick Tully with:
Ealing Hospital Trust =
Hurting? I Elastoplast!


THE ANAGRAM SET CATEGORY

1st - Mick Tully with:
Michael Flatley =
Him? Feet all clay.
He fell? Calamity!
Each fall timely?
Calmly hail feet.

eq.2nd - Larry Brash with:
Priapism is a sustained erection =
Penis remained up. O, it's at a crisis!
Pause sins. Medication repairs it.

eq.2nd - Meyran Kraus with:
Please add me to your mailing list =
You tell lies, I end it - do spamagram.
I do digital spam - lure, steal money.
Dull spam idiot. Steal money? I rage!
See my 'polite' anagrams, dull idiot.
You sad idiot illegal net spammer!

Larry Brash with:
The human genetic code =
An eugenic tech method.
Detecting humane echo.
Me encoding that cue, eh?
Deem chaotic gene hunt.
He attuned chic genome.
Cut the chained genome.
He untied genome. Catch?
Then educe the magic. No?
Entice a hunch? Meet God.

Richard Brodie with:
The human genetic code =
Thence touched enigma.
Ah! Met the encoding cue.
A hi-tech gene document.
Authentic genome CD, eh?
The genuine code match.
Echoing cute DNA theme.
Uh, the genome accident?
Denounce the... the magic!
Machine detect enough?
Detach genomic tune, eh?
Cute, demon teaching, eh?

Richard Brodie with:
It doesn't get any easier than this! =
Greedy Satan shit's on net. I hate it!
Hate greatest dishonest inanity.
Eighty-three Satan destinations.
Is it not threatening yet, ass-head?
I detest that annyoing shit. Erase!

Darren Donlen with:
Orthodontic Surgeon =
Using no other doctor.
Doctor gets in on hour.
Doctor tough on rinse.
Our second tooth; grin!
Ignores crud on tooth.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Coitus interruptus =
Purist route is cunt?
Introitus spurt cue.
Introitus truces up.
Tip nurtures coitus.
I cut trouser's input.

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Honeymoon =
Homey noon.
Oh! no money?
Hey! no moon!
O! No! m'honey!!
O-O! No hymen!!
One hymn: O-O!!!
Oh! My Neon, O!

Ernesto Guiraldes with:
Breast feeding =
Feasting breed.
Farts end beige.
Breeding feast.
Seeing brat fed.
Beating Dr's fee.
Fat brides' gene.

Earle Jones with:
The Dallas Cowboys =
Wasted by alcohols.
Bawdy asshole clot.
Boys acted shallow.

Meyran Kraus with:
A programmer analyst =
Alt.anagrams? Pry more.
Anagrammer? Sort, play!
Plots a merry anagram.
Story? Anagrammer, pal.

Meyran Kraus with:
Monica Lewinsky's Dress =
Dry semen? So lick was sin!
Rosy dicks, seminal news.
Screw on a desk? Slimy sin!
Oral dick, News: "Messy sin".
Icky semen was lord's sin.
Saw dick rise. Nylon? Mess!

Meyran Kraus with:
Sexual Relationship =
Exhilarates up loins.
A phallus exit - I snore.
Extra pain, house's ill.
Shut? Relax, oil a penis.

Keith Lehman with:
Michael Jackson Turns Forty =
Funky Contralto Search Jism.
Lo! Scam Artist! Johnny Fucker!
Johnny Claim Tort - Ass Fucker!


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